0 Tip 240: Post 1week birth be watchful

It is truly a miracle to be able to hold a new born baby and watch this new life explore the world. The fragile baby gets stronger bit by bit each day and feels better adapted to the new environment. The baby copes better as she feels the warm embrace of mummy and begin to smile at the goodness of love. Upon birth, the baby can weigh so light and its limbs and fingers so tiny. As previously blogged, I encouraged daddies to hold and carry their baby even if they feel less able than mummy. We, daddies are capable of many things beyond our imagination. Spending that extra time to carry and watch the baby does help mummy as well as give baby the much needed affection needed. Plus, the first week of birth may be the most crucial week of a baby's life as the baby is still learning the ropes of this new earth. The baby has just started learning how to lie on a bed outside the pool of liquid in mummy's womb. The baby is also having her first taste of saliva and fresh air. The baby just started moving her body, neck and back to allow her to inhale and exhale, as well as to adjust to a comfortable position. The baby had her first pain at the hospital during inoculation/ vaccination and has just understood that there is a level of pain and comfort to be experienced. The baby is starting to explore the cool/warm bed and adjust herself to a position that she can sleep well and breath well. The baby also learns quickly on when to cry whenever she wants milk. Yet, in all this new beginnings for the baby, it is but trial and error. There are probabilities of error beyond the baby's knowledge and sometimes even out of the awareness of daddy and mummy. Hence, the need for extra vigilance and attention during the first week of birth.

















I was observing Sayaka while she was lying on the bed on her back when she was around 4 days old, while mummy got out of bed for a while. Sayaka does have regular cravings for milk, so the increased saliva in her mouth. She was also quite active as possibly my constant attention and speaking with her spurs her to be curious of her surroundings. She was beginning to move quite a bit, kicking her legs and moving her neck. Then, as I speak to her, she suddenly got startled. She began to choke on her saliva and her face was turning red. I could see that her whole body was tensed up. She was trying hard to breath, but was unable. She was trying to cry, but was overwhelmed by the choking. Immediately, I carried her and pat her on her back a few times. I was so relieved when I heard her coughing and crying. The patting was akin to light Heimlich Maneuver that I have learnt from my first aid lessons during my school days. She possibly could have overcame it by herself through trial and error and learning to cough harder. I am sure this trial has made her stronger and I am glad that now at 3 months old, she has a very healthy and strong body through her active exploration of her limits. All in all, I am glad that I was around Sayaka during her first choking experience.













In Japan, babies usually stay in the hospital for 1 week after birth as it is paid for by the insurance. In Singapore/Malaysia, many would discharge from the hospital upon 2 days if there is normal and safe delivery. However, keeping constant eye on the baby may be necessary at least for the first week. In fact, attachment parenting principles will suggest sleeping next to your baby instead of in a separate bed.













(Photos show Sayaka at 3 days old, 1 month and 2.5 months old)

Detail: Tip 240: Post 1week birth be watchful

0 Tip 184: Earthquake preparedness in Tokyo

There were two earthquake incidents recently in Tokyo in just a span of 3 days, measuring a magnitude of 6.5 and another at 6.9. It didn't feel scary but it would be when we compare it to the destruction caused by the Great Hanshin or Kobe earthquake in 1995 that measured 7.3.











Thank God that our apartment unit survived with everything intact. Actually, the whole of Tokyo metopolis was little affected by the tremor. Most buildings and structures there had already undergone seismic retrofitting and comply to earthquake resistant standards. In fact, tall buildings were fitted with Malaysian natural rubber blocks to absorb shocks based on advanced Japanese earthquake engineering principles. When previously selecting an apartment unit, I followed Tomomi's advice to get a ground floor unit that is by the side that allows for quick escaping. It is good that Japan, especially Tokyo has a high degree of preparedness, but as daddies, there are other household seismic safety and preparations to be aware of. Previously blogged briefly on typhoons and earthquakes here, but this post contains more tips.











First, is the preparation of an emergency kit. It can be simple comprising mainly bottled water, battery powered torch and radio, whistle and some first aid supplies. This probably is more important for countries like America where convenience stores and vending machines are far away. For Japan, this kit would only be useful while you are being trapped in the building, God forbid that happening.











Next is to train the family through earthquake drills. If the child has not already undergone such training in school, many centers in Japan have earthquake simulations of the different magnitudes. Then, when the actual incident happens, everyone would be quick to duck and cover under a table. Most fatalities occur due to broken bones caused by falling objects or shattering glasses. Hence, arranging furniture with this in mind and securing high objects carefully can prevent such dangers.

Next, is to wear shoes and do a house check of potential dangers within the house of falling objects and fire. It may be safer to stay within safe distances to the exit while waiting indoors if the building is secure, than to panic and be crushed by human stampede or be injured by falling bricks elsewhere. By following government announcement, head to the designated earthquake evacuation center for supplies and shelter till the situation is declared safe.

It can be that straightforward and the rest would depend on circumstance and common sense to tackle them. Our life and death are after all in God's hands. I left out many specifics, but feel free to add other tips to the list.

(Photo taken with a Nikon D700 camera by an experienced photographer shows Haruka at a park near Namiki-chuo station, Kanazawa-ku, Yokohama. More family photos to come).

Detail: Tip 184: Earthquake preparedness in Tokyo

0 Tip 129: Parent pandemic preparation

The recently announced Swine flu pandemic has seen governments making many proactive preparations to control it. Some governments from developed countries even have drew out action plans years earlier and prepared a good stock pile of medicine as they had forecasted the possibility of a flu pandemic taking place in the near future. As much as the role of a state leader has grown more challenging, so is the burden of a parent. That is because equipped with knowledge in this information age, parents can do their bit to undertake safety precautions. Yeap, the long list of tasks and responsibilities of a parent have grown to not just merely provide for basic food and shelter to our kids. From providing education and the need to revere God to giving constant loving attention, from giving exposure to arts and music to encouraging the love of sports and other hobbies, the list goes on and on. But what can the parent do in regards to recent developments in pandemic? There are actually many practical steps down to rationing one's annual leave to cater for possible children sickness to be able to give the appropriate attention necessary. There will come a time when strict regulations would require children who are sick to be not admitted to nurseries and schools and the parents would have to take leave to care for them (and not trust entirely on their maids either). As population and globalization increase, the world grows weary about maintaining control and there will be more strict regulations that would ultimately affect the parent. Better be prepared than getting stressed out with little resources when the time comes for them.















I still remember an advice a teacher gave to me noticing my gungho attitude to want to seize every opportunity out there. She said,"Health is your best weapon to achieve success". As much as hard work and long hours may sometimes be necessary to get results, there needs to be a sustainable plan to ensure health is taken care of. Sustainability will be a theme that is highlighted more as developed countries push developing countries to adopt safer, ethical, cleaner and pollutant free methods even when developing countries are eager to deliver consistent high growth rates. Hence, as much as a trip by flight is necessary and paid for, there will be global regulations towards only admitting passengers who are in good health. This would mean the parent would need to ensure sufficient sleep and good health care habits for the whole family before important flights. As much as many circumstances are out of our control, safety precautions to avoid falling ill can be taken. For instance, I am beginning to be more mindful these days about Haruka putting her hands into her mouth. Since she now understands when I tell her not to do something, I try to spend more time to remind her. It helps since I carry her when we walk around most places. So I could easily reach out to remove her hands from her mouth and if necessary pull out a sanitized tissue to wipe her. It would be good if Haruka could one day learn how to wash her hands on her own and that would be another lesson daddy needs to teach her. Daddies also need to be checking at the nurseries, playcenters and Sunday Schools, if the teachers are enforcing stricter rules on admitting sick children to the group as there needs to be awareness that such safety and health precautions are more necessary than missing a few days of school. It probably is so much more simpler as a cave man daddy who only need to be concerned about hunting and bringing food back home each day. Now dad needs to also be ready with a sanitized tissue and be expecting it on others, something that's not part of his male instinct probably. Better be prepared, then be inconvenienced or worse, sorry for not taking the necessary precautions.















This may be not known to some, but in 1957-58, the Asian flu pandemic caused 2 million deaths globally and in 1968-69, the Hong Kong flu killed 1 million people globally. This is enough warning to have that sanitized tissue. Any daddy carrying it please leave a comment.















(Photos show more photos of Haruka's first Macau trip to Largo do Senado, the replica buildings near Sands and Babylon casino and finally the Venice like canals that even have gondola rides with gondoliers singing O Sole Mio (My Sun in Neapolitan/Southern Italian language) at the Venetian Macau which is the world's largest single casino resort and Asia's largest single structure hotel building).

Detail: Tip 129: Parent pandemic preparation

0 Tip 107: Do not jump lights when mummy is around

Its funny when you look back at possible disagreements that could happen between husbands and wives. Maybe, it can be less funny sometimes when you do not look at it with a sense of humor, objective mind, realistic mindset and calm heart. If one tends to hang on to an idealist view that two distinct individuals can read minds and have perfect knowledge of each other and agree to be at peace with each other at every moment in time, constantly consulting with each other on every possible suggestion and idea, constantly behaving based on each other's preferences and expectations, having the same ideals, beliefs and cultural habits, then such disagreements should never happen in the first place. But, we do not live in a perfect world, and as much as idealism can make this world better, we need to learn to be kind and accept one another all the time. Sometimes though, disagreements are meant to wake us up that we are wrong. Like when I crossed the road after watching that there was no traffic, even when the pedestrian crossing traffic light showed red. I did save 3 seconds before the light turned green. Or sometimes, my mind may have became one with the traffic light that my leg would move at the change of the signal light but technically, it was still red when my wife watched me crossed the road. So, I got the scolding and rows of disagreements on why I need to be nagged on the same issue over and over. Such happens in the daily life of a married couple.














Interestingly, the road crossing methodology is different in different countries. In Japan and sometimes Singapore, everyone follows religiously the pedestrian traffic light signal. They would wait patiently and only when the light turns green, a big group of pedestrians would cross the road quickly at the same time. Later, there is a warning sound and blink when the light is about to turn red again and everyone still on the road would hurriedly go over the other side of the road and countless others, would not attempt to cross the road even when the signal has not turned red yet. This does not happen in Hong Kong or Malaysia. One simple reason is that Malaysia do not have so many pedestrian traffic lights or overhead bridges. So, the pedestrians have gotten more brave to navigate the traffics on their own instincts on what is safe and what is not. They have more experience crossing busy roads and gained a spatial sense of how far the car is, at what speed it is travelling at, the possible reaction of the driver on whether it would stop or slow down and whether it would be safer for the pedestrian to run faster to cross the road when the car would not stop or its safer to step back and attempt to cross again. Same goes for Hong Kong even with more pedestrian traffic lights available. The citizens there have less of a law abiding mentality, a greater desire to gain on the extra seconds spent not waiting at the traffic lights and a generally higher propensity to take risk. A Japanese friend of mine who has lived more than 1 year in Hong Kong, even could flexibly adopt this law breaking habit of jay walking. So, its really a difference in cultural mentality, rather than what is right and wrong. But, I agree with my wife. Wives are always correct. If I have a baby in my arm, I need to wait till the light shows green. At least to avoid another long lecture, or having my wife threaten to go home after we have taken the train out to sightsee London. Hopefully, I would not forget that. Hey, all men have short term memories, right?














Do all men have short term memories of their wives' nagging or is it just me? Wives, are your husbands the same? Do console me. :)














(Photos show Regent Street and Oxford Street, London city).

Detail: Tip 107: Do not jump lights when mummy is around

0 Tip 49: Check the weather before you head out

Its been a sad month to know of both the Myanmar cyclone and the earthquake at China claiming tens of thousands of lives. I just watched The Day After Tomorrow movie before writing this post and global warming is at the top of my mind. Even Al Gore used it to refer to the Myanmar cyclone. According to him, hurricanes and storms have been part of seasonal weather conditions, but of late we have been seeing many Category 5 storms. I am personally being more concerned for my safety now as a dad than before I got married. As a teen, I used to want to be a hero in crisis situations (influenced by Hollywood movies) of how I plan to save others and myself. But, precautions are more on my mind these days than thinking of how to act during those situations. I am also personally more concerned for hurricanes, typhoons and cyclones than earthquakes. This site on earthquakes mentioned that earthquakes are not necessarily more frequent these days, but because of increased seismographic stations, more transparent reporting of damages and better global communication, the world has greater fear of earthquakes. But, I would be preparing myself for the months of May, June, July as its the season for storms in the Northern Hemisphere (countries north of the equator). What we should do is check out weather reports before you go out and check online on storm updates when you are working that day. Most people are getting used with these typhoon updates, but its always better to be safe than sorry. Everywhere around the globe, global warming would affect more drastic storms and floods and daddies need to be aware of possible storms and floods so your family need not be trapped in such situations as far as possible.

I would only bring my umbrellas after checking the online weather report and so far, the weather reporting in Japan is almost 100% accurate. I am sure the same for many developed countries. Usually, we would be alerted of storms/typhoons few days in advanced. By 1-2 days, we would know if the approaching typhoon would be a small one or not. Almost all the time, it subsides when it reaches Tokyo, but would hit hard Tomomi's hometown - the island of Okinawa, south of Japan. But, still if it rains heavy, trains maybe stalled. I live just 20 minutes bicycle ride from my office and my home is on higher ground and away from the ocean. Decided to focus on good location fundamentals when purchasing my apartment. Tomomi have always had the habit of keeping a few bottles of mineral bottles in our home in case of an earthquake. In Japan, we have an earthquake warning system that automatically halts trains, gas and critical manufacturing processes. Also, the buildings are built to withstand most earthquakes and its sad that its the poorer countries that would suffer more in the face of such disasters. Basic necessities such as blankets and disaster centers are few and it will be miserable especially if disaster hits a poor country during winter such as happened to India previously. In Tokyo, most public schools are designated as disaster centers with a huge supply of water. After watching the movie today, another useful tip would be to use the public phone booths/office or home phone lines to contact family members should your cell phone signal be not available. The month of May/June is a month of typhoons. There will be a typhoon approaching Tokyo this coming Tuesday, but so far, it seems mild and just bringing some showers. In fact, the showers in Tokyo are of smaller magnitude than the torrential tropical rainfall back home in Malaysia. But Daddy is ready to be safe.

Detail: Tip 49: Check the weather before you head out